Michelle Scourtos "Where I blow, out comes spiders. Where I step, a weed dies."

merry x-mas

I finished this x-mas eve 2014. collage.

fine!!!

I am going to start f*cking with my mini amp and maybe re-record part of this... I process in the editor, doesn't overload system and yet there is a crackle when I upload - why life?

with a time machine, me and everyone else in the universe could be rich for a second or two...

I have no idea how or why this happened now but I believe this is my first club track... like if the club were stuck in a time warp...
not to toot my own horn too much, but, enjoying doing this right now.

so, while navigating "art walk" yesterday some smarmy realtor gave me his card in case I wanted to rent an apartment or buy a property (which was hilarious given my financial position, but, he didn't get how broke I am) so I said, "maybe, if you are hiring" and handed him my resume. good moment to be scourtos.

large scale paintings of bookshelves

is a genius idea.

or...........

my audition for the residents.

assignment for a hack academic - no credit no cash though, SORRY!

or a pre - law student who needs practice building bogus arguments.

when I was in sixth grade

I dressed up as a homeless person for halloween. this was pretty much what I came up with as a costume - please help me get a job that affords a one bedroom and computers? the longer I wait, the harder the transition will be...

happy thanksgiving!

the gravy is slightly thick but I am going to have a heart attack - biscuit is perfect and I am already full... low balling but awesome.

flour power. ok, I will stop before I become one of those people who has to be stopped.
(and all before my morning shower...)

No Smoking!

I just finished this tonight! (also on a pizza box!)
and I was curious if it would look ominous in black and white...

cloud and debris revision:

re: the idea of depression...

If the psychiatric community wants to exist, it should be a free service provided by the gov't since all it does is try to ameliorate the pain of not being able to realize your desires and potential. remains to be seen whether or not it would be cheaper to fund projects for people and subsidize more "dream jobs" rather than fund doctors and drug companies...
as someone with a decent amount of toys at the moment, I had to... Major Depression.

WILD.

that is genuinely outrageous. maybe the new law should be cops carry tazers. only back up officers carry guns...
I was looking for stats on cops killed vs. innocents killed (though cops probably fold into innocents) and found this...

sick tires.

a weak

it's been almost a month, more collage work and employment office SO SOON.
fixing the crackles is the triumph, not a masterpiece, just been a few weeks since I wrote anything...

I HAD to

just laying in bed haunted by how related these are because I am ridiculous.

Did I get the job?

(It is from a web job posting. I know what they meant but this is funny to me)

me in grad school...

I didn't draw the large character just redrew and put it on the t-shirt. making fun of my own insistence of wearing a shirt with my own face on it.

riding the wave... not totally.

In highschool I was really hard on third wave feminists - who wants to be liberated to wear lipstick, but, as I get older I have come to understand that it is about choices.

hitler moustache bangs

it is time for bed...

Youth In Asia

Osama joke - not appropriate but I just thought of it.

I am really not one of those people enthusiastic about Osama being killed. I don't want to be deported because I am a terrorist sympathizer but I was not happy that he was killed. I do wish though that, before he was killed, I had realized how funny it is that he wears green camo in the mountains.

you know, like that... blend in with rubble and sand... ( I asked about snow etc. camo years ago and I know they make sand camo...)

that is cool

that is cool - when I was trying to figure out how to make things float my two "go to"'s were helium balloons and fans. I like that.

I made other versions of this a few years ago and now they aren't on my blog - I don't know why I would have gotten rid of them...

Subway to Prom

true story.

almost the office but a bit more over the top.

that is actually a kinda funny office but not quite the office sort of scene - someone gets fired and comes in with their cover band (their next best idea for paying rent) and cover "I will survive" - I would laugh.

here is the funniest idea EVER:

here is the funniest idea EVER: close down banks behaving badly. open up newer, smaller banks and hire bright eyed underqualified candidates who just want to make a lot and have done little to no research into the collapse. bait them with the same ideas that caused first crash. hilarity ensues. (that is not what this article says, but it sparked my mind)

I made a joke.

I made a joke about doing the equivalent to my spray painted mini cooper - true story.

Wading to Pave

on a pizza box, finished tonight.

p.s.

first guitar.

New Fantasy World Idea:

new fantasy world idea: You have to submit your entire musical collection and tangential likes to the person allowing you to rent/buy a place. this goes for a 10 mile radius if a house and a 10 story above and below if an apartment keeping in mind the 4 closest other buildings if the next apartment building is close. use the technology they have to say "If you like this, you might like this"

wed. or thurs.? I miss larger scale.

collage featuring this should be done wed. or thurs.
man do I miss have more space and making these larger.
(I have a better jpg, I just like the titanic version for now.)

I take back my estimated finish date - should be done tonight!

I made a meditation garden

awwwwww.

Hilarious premise for a porno:

a bunch of sex addicts trying to get clean together in a communal live/work environment.

do they have rehab for that?

someone asked me to make the image on the right look more comic book-esque

I am not really disappointed in myself (they don't seem that psyched though...) they asked me to do it without redrawing, I don't see how I would have done that...

photoshopping on a saturday.

will likely recycle this bass riff because this configuration makes me nervous but I like that riff...

Cornered (Hit or Miss)

a small collage study in perspective that I completed today.

depending on where you stand it either will or wont.

crafting.

it really feels like craft when you've been lethargic all week and your "inspiration" is getting zippers at a craft store - these will be done in a day or so, real one in a week or so...

DIY or die

literally.
here is my awesome solution for my bike brakes that wear down super quickly - packing foam.

have not yet road tested. fingers crossed.

I have made similar joke...

yes, I do think I can do better than burger king and, yes, I am that desperate to move out and have cash for my sh*t that I applied and, yes, I am pissed that these links aren't working.

MY GAY BEAST T-SHIRT IS MISSING - I AM SO PISSED OFF

MY GAY BEAST T-SHIRT IS MISSING - I AM SO PISSED OFF
AND A TUBE OF PAINT. annoying.

I got some career advice recently

from someone I used to hang out with - "strip away your cool interests and all you have is a brat."
to them I say, "stop telling people you can read and write english and all you have is an ornery illiterate handyman."
(not sure if this person thinks I should bring back radio 90's rap or just thinks I am a literal brat - hard to tell in writing - I DO wear a lot of flannel.)

star f*ckers

(my references feel limited at the moment)

throwing down

tentative album in order

8 years out of college

the chamber of 1993 echoes unemployment.

this started out as a cool 90's sounding riff and I turned it into a campy dance goth song.

happy 9/11

a few days too late - here is my new soundcloud.

here is the thing

so - I have been thinking about how they burn surplus food - let's give the macro biotic people some credit and say that there should be more farms everywhere so if/when there is a complete breakdown of modern society, we can work things out to prevent as many deaths as possible.

I want a tomato plant.

other ridiculous ways to waste cash as a nouveau riche

leave your clothing in your shower room that is running scalding hot water to create immense amounts of steam instead of ironing.
unless heat and hot water is included, in which case, you are totally saving on electricity.

be shocked.

like, super shocked.

wait for the hardcore vocals to kick in until you decide that I am wrong to call this shocking.

territorial pissings + Erlkonig

Does someone want to do a modern interpretation of Erlkonig that uses territorial pissings - I think that would be as funny as MTVs attempt at wuthering heights in the late 90s/early 00s. I am so old and out of touch in some ways.

That's the same girl?

me, michelle scourtos, on my bike, badass, I know.

Crane Drain

I finished this tonight.

jewish + hip

I am envisioning gold and white paisley tablecloths and leather placemats at a cedar. cause that is what I would think was jewish + hip

Heartstrings

heartstrings (not in my country) will be pulled.

has someone already done this -

the dolly - lama?

best win in awhile.

I rule at that against this program.

yawn-ie

I have to be crass...

if that is not a movie about blowjobs, I do not understand life.

fridge probs.

p.s. if your fridge breaks down but your freezer still works - keep things in buckets of ice in the fridge compartment - it works!

there are pages missing from my copy of the gay science

there are pages missing from my copy of the gay science - that is a problem for me. yeah, it is funny if you think I didn't understand the aphorism, I did.
I have a problem with that.

I think I wish it weren't black...

that scares me a little bit - like not giacometti cause it is totally possible, but looks so mean and uncomfortable.

does anyone have a hand dryer in their apt.

does anyone have a hand dryer in their apt. If I were directing a movie about nouveau riche who had never previously been to an actually wealthy persons apt, that would be the first thing they bought.
Their eyes pop out of their heads when they get first months electric so they put an out of order sign on it.